The way we talk to ourselves is crucial. Self-talk can be positive and motivating or negative and critical. This positive type of self-talk can be regarded as our “inner coach” while the negative kind of self-talk can be referenced as our “inner critic.” Pinnacle Recovery wants to go over the differences below and talk about how this relates to our recovery of substance use.
Your inner coach is the positive self-talk that you use with yourself when you are problem-solving. Your inner coach can be motivating and compassionate.
Your inner critic comes out when you have made a mistake, or something is difficult. Your inner critic can be demeaning and rude.
Inner coach versus inner critic is something you need to learn to balance. When something is difficult, and you need an extra push, your inner coach must give that to you. When you are feeling down on yourself, your inner coach needs to pick you back up. Using your inner critic doesn’t solve problems; it just magnifies them. Listed below are some scenarios. The first line is something that your inner critic would tell you during a difficult situation. The second line is how you can rephrase that to come from the perspective of the inner coach.
- You can’t remember where you put your keys.
- “If you just put them back where they’re supposed to be you wouldn’t have to spend time looking for them now!”
- “Let me retrace my steps. It will only take a few minutes.”
- You make a mistake at work.
- “I’m such an idiot! That was so simple.”
- “I’m going to make a note of this for next time something like this comes up.”
- Your spouse cancels on you.
- “I’m worthless.”
- “We will try again tomorrow!”
There are ways to rephrase what you are thinking to make sure you are speaking to yourself in a positive and respectful way. If you are struggling with your self-talk, imagine talking to yourself like you would a young child. You don’t curse or talk down upon younger you, why does that change just because you’re older? Be kind to yourself. You deserve it.
Pinnacle Recovery is here for you. If you are struggling, we have programs that can help you. Call now at 1-866-301-0573 to speak to a member of our team. We can’t wait to hear from you!