Ghosting makes you disappear. Gaslighting can make you feel like you’re going crazy. There are no rules on how to behave it seems these days. That’s the reason why gaslighting and ghosting provoke powerful emotions and responses in people. Handling it in recovery is another story. Find out why responding well to this issue is important for long-term, healthy recovery.
Resist Gaslighting, Get Ghosted
Ghosting is a term that means someone has cut you off and out. It includes unfriending on social media, not returning phone calls, and basically acts as if they never knew you. Ghosting in dating leaves the ghosted one wondering what happened. In friendship, it amounts to the same. Why would someone disappear without explanation? Why not be honest and say the relationship is not working out. There is nothing you can do about it except accept and move on. Ghosting sets you free from someone who doesn’t care about you, so that’s a good thing.
Escape Toxic Relationships
Ghosting occurs when someone needs to get away from an abusive or dangerous person. Moving, changing numbers, blocking phone calls, and other ways of survival can be difficult for people but that is not really ghosting. Clarity is key. Cutting someone out and disappearing for survival is not ghosting. It is a form of empowerment, healing, and a way to move on from someone who is not healthy.
When to Withhold Honesty
It can be a weird thing to think you need to not be honest with someone that you ghosted. Perhaps you cannot be bothered to remember to handle that one thing you said you would get to and suddenly time has gone by and you have not done what you said you would do. If a relationship is not working out with someone you cared about, it would be nice if an explanation were offered. Other people simply shrug and move on. Everyone is different and nobody has the right answers. Perhaps you don’t need to be dishonest, but simply not go back into a situation that might be more than you can handle right now in recovery.
There used to be something called etiquette that everyone learned. It depends on who you are and what you have learned, but many people these days blew right past etiquette. The rules of order were set to help people navigate situations with people and come out on the other side feeling better about how you behaved. This revolved around pitching in to help, giving to charity, caring for others, not gossipping, and not going behind other people’s backs. Those rules had no place for one’s own feelings nor did they acknowledge the complicated reality of other people’s mental health and how it affects you. Self awareness is really the key to better relationships. Understanding these things can help you navigate what has become a much trickier world without rules to keep people safe. Recovery programs can help support your journey in learning etiquette, and finding ways of better behaving in social settings, especially when you are newly sober.
Out of our beautiful custom home in Holladay, Utah, Pinnacle Recovery offers a premiere, customized clinical continuum of care for addiction, alcoholism, and co-occurring disorders. With the healing and inspiring scenery of the breathtaking Utah mountains all around you, you’ll be motivated to work toward deep, lasting change and recovery. Call us today for information on our programs: 866-301-0573